Monday, 4 October 2010

Why blog?

Time - 21.06 
Calorific intake - probably about 1000 (oh god) 
Weight - Incredibly obese
Clothes size - 6 - 10 (UK), 2-6 (US)

Hello Reader,

My names Ruby, I'm twenty years old and live in Scotland. I have what I know to be some pretty screwed up problems with food. No one really knows about how I feel about eating. My boyfriends referred to be as anorexic, but I would never take such a title. I feel I'm much too big to be considered anorexic. I can't however argue when he says I'm bulimic and obsessed with food.

Here I will tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth about my eating habits. I also intend to use this blog to collect thinspiring things, a bit like a scrap book of thinspo.

If I write it here i cant ignore it - its the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Today I have made myself sick twice. First it was a tin of minestrone soup - only 140 cals. I believe I got it all out.

Less than an hour ago I ate some pasta, sushi, crisps and a diet chocolate pudding. It came to about 1000 calories. I believe i was successful in getting at least 50% of this food out, but I'm taking no risks. I'm going to count today as a 1000 calorie binge.

I feel better for eating what i ate because i was sick. However, at the weekend i consumed about 3000 calories all in which is just disgusting, but it was my boyfriends birthday and i wanted to make sure that the focus of the weekend wasn't that i was unwell - it was him.

So tomorrow i start start my fast. Im hoping to also exercise through the fast if im better (iv been really sick the last couple of days). This total fast must last until Saturday.  If I fail then im doomed to be a fat girl forever and ever. After this fast my boyfriends home from his work so I'll find it hard to get away with not eating - but i must try.

Unfortunately, thin is everything for me, and its a goal I WILL reach.

Blog soon


1 comment:

  1. Hey Ruby,
    like your blog so far!
    Dunno, maybe you'd like to check out mine, it's
    Definitely gonna follow yours ;)
    xoxo Effy